Street Angel

I grabbed my pencil and a pad of paper. It had suddenly occurred to me that I wanted to write a poem to read onstage at the LA Music Awards Voting & Press event. This was huge, I have never spoken on stage in front of so many people before. Just the thought of it made me shake. But at the same time, it was like an adrenaline rush. It was trying something new and out of my comfort zone. By now, I am pretty used to being around big crowds, having people gawk at me in my angel outfit, having photos taken of me, and making home YouTube videos, but stage fright is a whole different beast to wrestle! 

My hand was shaking a little bit as I hung it over the paper, contemplating what to write. My flashbacks started:

{Taking my wings out of my trunk that first day of my Angel Project, my whole body was trembling. I was wondering if I was stark raving mad for acting on these inner promptings. I was so new to LA, I barely knew my way around yet. I had met a few people but didn't have any friends yet, I was that new. And there I was, deciding to dress like an angel in a strange new land and go stand on a street corner. I think I was struggling more with what I thought of myself than about what others were going to think of me. Buying the angel outfits and creating the posters was a start, but it was those epic first steps to actually go out on the street corner, that were the scariest. The notion of what other people thought of me quickly set in as soon as I saw people looking and staring at me. I was glad when all the people I encountered that first day had a positive and supportive response. But there were plenty of people who acted like I didn't exist. Like, people would literally walk right past me, I'd smile/wave/say hi to them, and they'd look through me like I was a ghost or something. That was strange to me. But standing there with my posters and posing beside people who wanted to take a photo with me, felt so...amazing. In the sense that, it meant what I was doing was "working" and having a positive affect on others. The messages were resonating with people. It was a bliss in my heart that I felt like I was doing a good thing, without expectation of reward, simply because I followed my soul's urges and was fulfilling that.} {Read related blog: "The Calling"}

-------------(I go off on a tangent now)-------------------

Maybe I really am a ghost to some people! You never know what someone else's view of life looks like...I've read that if you vibrate at a high enough frequency, that you will be invisible to some other lower-vibrational beings. Pretty cool. If you think about it, that's the way Angels work. I absolutely believe in them now since I've seen two of them. Just glimpses. They were transparent beings that move around really fast in the sky!! Just the fact that they presented themselves to me, the fact that I saw them, that I saw something supernatural for myself, I believe. I know they're around. I've used this line in another blog: It's easy to not believe in things until you see them for yourself. Same goes for "aliens". There are so many advanced forms of life and energy in this universe that the average human mind can't even fathom it, and many people have no awareness of it or don't even contemplate it. I've met some supernatural people here in LA. I'm talking about people who have strong energy fields that you can FEEL (at least I could!), and meeting people who are so clairvoyant, they can tell you what you ate for breakfast in some detail. It's nuts! in a cool way!

--------------(Back to the poem story)--------------------

When I was finished writing the poem, I was most pleased. I felt like I'd put my emotion into it, and the words held that energy somehow. The stage appearance wasn't what I was expecting, which was actually good because I ended up feeling more calm than I thought I would. I thought it was going to be 900 seated, silent people staring at me, but instead it was a crowded, rather dark, big, double-decker room (had a balcony of both seated and standing people) with some noise of people talking in the background. However, when I went up on the stage to speak on the microphone, it did seem like it got much more quiet than it had been earlier during the event. People were....actually listening! It was awesome that people were coming up to me afterwards saying they liked my poem. It's always nice to feel validated.

{Photo taken at the LA Music Awards preliminary voting and press event; prior to the main event- video below:}

I try to not rely on other's people's opinions and validations as much since having a higher awareness of things than I ever have had before, but it's always nice to be encouraged and supported! That's what keeps me going with this angel project! I maintain that if I'm able to positively affect even just one person a day, then I consider that a success and progress to me. I want to serve, help, uplift others in whatever random ways that I can. That stuff makes the heart sing. Here are 2 quotes for you to ponder so that you'll understand what I mean more, at least one facet, when I mention having a higher awareness of things: 1) "When I am independent of the good or bad opinion of others, I stand strong in my own divine power." 2) "When I recognize and acknowlege my personal power, I no longer need to feel superior or inferior to anyone else." Both quotes are from the wise author and speaker Deepak Chopra.

Thank you everyone who supports me, reads my blogs, watches my videos, does good deeds, spreads kindness, and helps others! Your good works in life don't go unnoticed, the Angels see and the universe will reward you back in some way!

~Mandelyn Reese

The LA Street Angel

9/27/13